


some kind of resolution

by jetplane



Series: Whumptober 2020 [2]
Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Apologies, Episode: s02e15 Revelations, Gen, Guilt, Guns, Gunshot Wounds, Hurt Aaron Hotchner, Hurt Spencer Reid, Kidnapping, Restraints, Spencer Reid Whump, Whumptober 2020
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-02
Updated: 2020-10-02
Packaged: 2021-03-07 15:50:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,320
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26780173
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jetplane/pseuds/jetplane
Summary: “Tell me who you serve,” Raphael commands.Spencer gulps. “I serve you,” he whispers meekly.The killer’s gaze is unwavering. “Then choose one to die.”Spencer tells Raphael that Hotch is a narcissist, and he believes him. When the team manages to recover him, Reid feels awful about what he's done.prompts: kidnapping and "pick who dies" (day 2)
Relationships: Aaron Hotchner & Spencer Reid
Series: Whumptober 2020 [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1946050
Comments: 6
Kudos: 144
Collections: Whumptober 2020





	some kind of resolution

**Author's Note:**

> see endnote for content warnings
> 
> Can be Reid/Hotch if you want (there are definitely some vibes), but was originally written to be platonic
> 
>  _you want a revelation  
>  you want to get right  
> but it’s a conversation  
> I just can’t have tonight  
> you want a revelation  
> some kind of resolution  
> you want a revelation_  
> \- “No Light, No Light” by Florence + The Machine

Raphael holds his revolver inches from Reid’s head, close enough that he can’t stare down the barrel without double vision. As his captor pulls the trigger for the third time, Reid realizes that he still has one last chance to get out alive.

“I…” Spencer runs his tongue over his teeth. “I choose Aaron Hotchner.” Raphael lowers his gun and the words start to spill out as Reid’s chest flutters. “He’s a classic narcissist. He thinks he’s better than everyone else on the team.” He stares up into Tobias’s eyes, praying his desperation will come off as genuine. “Genesis 23:4. ‘Let him not deceive himself and trust in emptiness, vanity, falseness, and futility, for these shall be his recompense.’”

Raphael raises his gun and pulls the trigger once again. This time, a bullet explodes from the chamber and tears through the wooden wall just behind Reid. He can’t help but flinch, knowing the same projectile could have easily been directed into his head.

When Reid can force himself to look up, something like pride shines in the murderer’s eyes. “For God’s will,” he says cooly, holding up another shiny bullet. He loads it into his revolver and gives it a spin. Then he shoves the firearm into his coat and strides out without another word.

With the shed empty, Spencer leans his head back and closes his eyes. He takes a few deep breaths, reveling in Raphael’s absence until the thought hits him suddenly. _What if Hotch doesn’t understand what I was trying to say?_ he frets. _Does he think I hate him? Where is Hotch, anyway? Can Raphael really find him? Oh no, what if he actually hurts him? What if...I just killed Hotch?_

The fears are overwhelming to Reid’s exhausted, traumatized, drug-hazed brain. As panic swells in his chest, the agent can feel his breaths getting shorter and his vision begins to blur. With the stress on his body only growing as he starts to fade, it doesn’t take long for Spencer to slip into unconsciousness.

-

It’s been almost a week since Reid went missing and Raphael hasn’t streamed any more footage to his house. Garcia continually runs searches across the country and even overseas for crimes matching Hankel’s signature, but nothing comes of any of them. The rest of the team drown themselves in ever-vanishing straws and endless cups of lukewarm coffee.

Hotch knows Spencer is still alive. Maybe it’s guilt or wishful thinking, but he keeps the team in the Hankel house just in case. They go through Tobias’s life and property time and time again, searching for any clues as to where their friend might be. But if Hankel has left a clue for them, they’re just as ignorant to it as he is.

That’s why, on the sixth day, Hotch finds himself answering a phone call from Strauss instead of profiling Tobias’s belongings like the rest of the team. He hears the abhorrent ring and digs his cell phone out of his pocket. “Hotchner,” he snaps. Even with his frustration, he keeps his voice low as to not distract the rest of the team.

“Agent Hotchner.” The voice on the other end is Erin Strauss, and her tone sounds almost apologetic. “We need to discuss-”

“No,” he interrupts. “I know you want us to take other cases. That’s not going to happen.”

“Agent Hotchner, it’s been four days since your Agent Reid was seen alive. If you haven’t made any progress since then, I can’t justify keeping you in the field any longer. Your jet is being prepared to return to Quantico this afternoon.”

Hotch can’t believe his ears. “You can't recall us,” he protests. “Dr. Reid is a highly educated agent and the youngest to ever be made an SSA at the Bureau. He _matters_.”

“I agree with you completely. But the rest of your team is also extremely valuable to the Bureau and you’re needed elsewhere. You can stay in contact with local police as they continue your search-“

“My team is not going to leave!”

Everyone stares at Hotch, and he realizes how much his voice has risen. His team is already stressed beyond belief; they don’t need their boss adding the final straw to their burden.

“Aaron,” Gideon says softly. “Why don’t you take your call outside?” Hotch sheepishly nods and ducks out the back door.

It’s easier for him to put together his thoughts as he breathes in the cold, clean air. As he talks to Strauss again, he’s able to do so with coherence. Being a former prosecutor, he’s argued for people’s lives many times. He can do it one more time. Eventually, he manages to wear down Strauss and she agrees to three more days. It’s something. He won’t have to abandon Spencer today.

Hotch is just about to head back into the house when he hears a rustling noise behind him. He spins and draws his gun from his holster only to find nothing but a few leaves blowing across the dirt.

The agent shakes his head. _Too much coffee_ , he thinks ruefully. Aaron returns the weapon to his hip and has just secured it when he hears his name. “Agent Hotchner?”

Hotch whirls around just in time to see a man standing at the edge of the forest. His revolver aims directly at Aaron’s heart.

A shot rings out.

-

Derek has been in law enforcement long enough to localize a gunshot when he hears one, and he knows as the others are still recovering that the sound came from the back of the house. His gun clears his holster as he takes off across the room, slamming the door open. His brain faintly registers Hotch’s figure on the ground, but his focus is tunneled around the shooter. His prey.

He takes off in the direction of the forest as Hankel begins to run. The unsub is surprisingly fast, but Morgan has years of training and the fear of losing both Aaron and Spencer. Derek slowly gains on him.

Finally, Hankel makes the mistake of looking behind him, and his pace slows just enough to lose the lead. Morgan dives at the unsub, throwing his full body weight on top of him. “FBI!” he shouts. “Don’t move!” He cuffs the unsub in a prone position before flipping him over and getting a good look at his face for the first time. It’s Tobias Hankel.

“You,” Morgan growls. “Where is he? Where’s Reid?”

Raphael’s gaze is disconcertingly calm. “For the sin of their mouths, the words of their lips, let them be trapped in their pride,” he replies. The man doesn’t seem fazed at all.

Derek has to fight the urge to hit him. “That’s not an answer, dammit! Tell me where he is,” the agent demands. When Raphael only smiles, Morgan roughly hauls him to his feet. Two police officers appear on the trail from which they’ve come, and it’s clear they’re expecting Morgan to hand the killer off to them. He does so with a glare and a hard push.

“We’ll take him to our precinct,” one of the officers assures Morgan. “He’s not getting away this time.”

“Wait,” he blurts out suddenly. Derek steps closer to Hankel and pulls a leaf from his jacket. It’s dry, unlike the green of the forest surrounding them, and he shoves it in the faces of the two local officers. “Where are these trees?”

Both men look at the leaf, then each other. One of them takes another look and then frowns. “I’m not sure,” he begins slowly. “But it looks an awful lot like Walnut Grove.”

“Is there anywhere you could hide someone?” Morgan asks. “Any kind of house or shack or-”

“There’s a cabin on the Marshall Plantation,” the officer blurts out, eyes lighting up. “It’s been abandoned for years, but-”

“I need to go there,” Derek interrupts. “Assemble whatever force you can and tell them to meet me at Marshall.”

-

Hotch jolts to awareness with a gasp as pain shoots through his chest. His eyes snap open and he squints up at the bright lights above him.

An unfamiliar face appears above him. “Mr. Hotchner, can you hear me?”

He tries to nod, but his head won’t seem to move. The agonizing pain in his chest does nothing to improve the situation, nor does the fact that he has no idea where he is. _Did something happen? Why does everything hurt?_

A new face comes into view. “Hotch,” she says, and he feels something slip into his hand. “It’s JJ. You’re in an ambulance. Can you squeeze my hand?”

Somehow, her voice soothes him just enough that he can focus on the task. _Squeeze. I can do that._

It’s more of a pinch than a squeeze, but the relief that floods over JJ’s expression is huge. “Good,” she breathes. “You’re going to be alright, Hotch. Just stay with me.”

“What - what happened?” he croaks.

JJ’s forehead pinches worriedly. “You were shot outside the Hankel house,” she says. “We’re almost to the hospital.”

“T-team,” Hotch forces out. His eyes dart around, but all he can see is JJ and the two medics in the ambulance.

“They’re alright. Everyone’s alright,” JJ replies. Hotch lets out a breath of relief and lets his eyelids flutter. It’s too much effort to keep them open. “Hotch?!”

He manages to half-open his eyelids again. With the last of his strength, he grips JJ’s hand. “Reid,” he gasps. “Have to...find Reid.”

That’s his last thought before he slips back into the dark.

-

Gideon’s phone rings as he drives. “SSA Jason Gideon,” he says as he puts the device on speaker.

“Gideon, it’s Morgan.” The agent’s breaths are heavy. “We got the shooter - it’s Tobias Hankel - and I think I know where Reid is. I’m heading there right now with the local officers.”

“Where?”

“Marshall Plantation. It’s just a few miles west of the house.”

Jason hesitates, then slams on his brakes. He makes a sharp turn in the middle of the road, grateful that no one is behind him, and speeds off in the opposite direction. “I’ll meet you there. Be safe.” The older agent’s tone is just the smallest bit heavier than normal, and Morgan picks up on it.

“Did he - did Tobias...get Hotch?”

Gideon clenches the steering wheel tighter as he recalls the blood seeping into the dirt surrounding Aaron’s body. “The bullet went through his chest. He lost a lot of blood,” he admits and hears Morgan take in a quick breath. “But he still had a pulse when they put him in the ambulance.”

“Oh, God,” Derek mutters.

“He’s still alive, Morgan,” Gideon reminds him. “The doctors are going to do everything they can for him. The only thing we can do is find Reid.”

-

One of the local officers wants to take the lead, but Morgan won’t have it. He’s the one standing in front of the door, who shouts “FBI!” before striking the old wooden board with his heel and darting inside before anyone else. “Clear!” he calls out. He hears more calls of “clear!” as others file in, checking each room. With each one, Derek’s heart sinks a little bit more.

And then someone calls out the two most beautiful words Morgan has ever heard. “He’s here!” Derek tears through the small cabin, searching for the sound of the voice, and then...he sees him.

He’s still tied to that godawful wooden chair - _has he been there this whole time?_ \- with his hands bound and his head slumped forward. For a paralyzing moment, Morgan thinks he’s too late, but then he sees Reid’s chest rise. He’s alive.

Derek hurries forward and crouches at Spencer’s side. “Reid?” He gives his friend’s shoulders a shake, but the doctor doesn’t respond. “Spencer.” Morgan gently tips Reid’s head upwards and his stomach turns when he sees how much dried blood is on his face. “Spencer, can you hear me? It’s Morgan.” One eyelid twitches and hope fills Derek’s body. “Spencer?”

The doctor pries his eyelids open to look at Morgan. He lets out a weak groan. “M’r’gn?”

Derek lets out a breath of relief. “Yeah, Pretty Boy, it’s Morgan. Tobias is gone, everything’s going to be alright.” He rushes to untie Spencer’s wrists, which are thinner than Morgan remembers, and Gideon joins him in freeing his legs.

Reid’s glassy eyes try to focus on the older profiler. “Gid-Gid’n?” he whispers.

Jason puts his hand on Reid’s shoulder. “I’m right here, son.” He looks over Spencer’s bloodied face, the bruises on his arms, and the swelling on his bare foot. As the young agent grounds himself by holding Morgan’s hand, Gideon turns to look at the officers standing behind them. “I don’t think he can walk. Tell the medics that we’re going to need a gurney.” He looks back at Reid.

“You hear that, Pretty Boy?” Morgan coaches encouragingly. “Medics are here and they’re going to help you out.” He takes in Reid’s injuries and tries not to let his anger show. “I know you’re in pain, but it’s all over.”

To his surprise, Reid weakly shakes his head. He stares through Morgan. “No pain,” he slurs. “To-Tob-”

“We’ve got Tobias in custody. He can’t hurt you anymore.”

He shakes his head more vigorously. “Not Tobias…” Spencer trails off, and Gideon and Morgan are forced to take a few steps back as medics arrive. They lift him onto the gurney without incident, and for a moment, Reid seems to relax. Then his eyes snap open with worry. “The team!” he blurts out, jerking upright despite his weakened condition. “JJ…Hotch?”

“Whoa,” Morgan says, steadying Reid with one shoulder while Gideon places his hand on the other. “JJ’s fine, I promise.”

“H’tch?” Reid asks again, eyes darting between his two coworkers as they force him to lie back down. “Something’s wrong?”

Gideon squeezes Spencer’s shoulder a little more firmly. “Hotch was shot, Spencer,” he says gently. “Tobias shot him.”

Reid’s eyes widen. “No!” he cries out as he shakes his head. His face crumples and tears start to roll down the side of his face. “He wasn’t supposed to - I didn’t want him to-” He starts to struggle.

“Hey,” Morgan says, reaching for Spencer’s cheek. “Spencer, you have to calm down.”

“No,” Reid sobs, jerking his head away from Derek’s touch. “No, no, I didn’t - get off - I thought-” Morgan and Gideon have to fight to hold him down as Spencer continues to thrash, his speech losing coherence. He doesn’t stop until one of the medics finally retrieves a sedative and injects it into his arm. He calms almost immediately, eyelids fluttering shut as the drug sends him into a blissful slumber.

-

When Hotch next regains consciousness, he’s in a hospital bed. The lights are just as painfully bright as they were in the ambulance, but surprisingly, the pain in his chest has lessened significantly. _Morphine_ , he thinks as he notices an IV in his arm.

Garcia notices the movement and jumped out of her chair. “Oh! Sir!” She hurries towards him and takes his hand. “You’re awake! How are you feeling? Does anything hurt? I can get the-”

“Garcia,” he groans. “What happened?”

“You were shot, sir,” she says. “By - by Tobias Hankel.”

“Hankel?” The memories come rushing back to him at once, and he tries to sit up. Pain flares through Aaron’s body, but that doesn’t stop him from reaching out to Garcia and grasping at her hand weakly. “Reid. Hankel knows where Reid is, you have to-”

“They got Reid, sir,” Penelope interrupts, her tone soothing, and he lets her ease him back onto his back. She points to the bed beside him. “He’s here.” Hotch turns his head and gets his first glimpse of Spencer in five days.

He looks smaller than Aaron remembers, with bruises peppering his pale skin and tearing at Hotch’s heart. One of Spencer’s feet is in a cast, and his head is wrapped in clean, white bandages. But he’s alive. “He’s okay?” Hotch whispers in disbelief.

“He hasn’t woken up yet,” Garcia cautions. “His surgery was a lot longer than yours.”

“But he’s going to make a full recovery.” Hotch’s head whips around to find Morgan standing in the doorway with a determined look in his eyes. “Both of you are.” He strides over to his boss and pats the man gently on the shoulder. “It’s going to be alright, man. Get some rest.”

-

Two hours later, JJ gasps. “I think he’s waking up,” she announces as she hurries to Reid’s side. The others all follow, crowding around the hospital bed. They hold their breaths, waiting for movement. “Spencer?” JJ asks. “Spence, can you hear me?”

His eyelids flutter and then squeeze shut, body tensing. “He looks like he’s in pain,” Emily says worriedly.

“I think it’s the lights,” Morgan realizes. He hurries to the door and flicks the light switch off. After a moment, Reid tries to open his eyes again. Without the fluorescent lighting, he can tell where he is. He’s in the hospital.

“There you are,” JJ breathes. She lets out a sigh of relief. “Spence, can you hear me? How’re you feeling?”

He opens his mouth, but no sound comes out. Reid tries again. “Water,” he croaks.

A cup immediately appears in front of him, with JJ gently guiding the straw to his mouth. Spencer nearly chokes as he sucks it in, and she has to pull away for a moment so he can breathe. “Careful,” she says. “Slow down.”

With his thirst quenched, Reid seems to be a little more alert. His vision has cleared, and he can see everyone around him. Morgan at his feet. Garcia and Gideon on his left, and JJ and Prentiss on his right. _Wait. That doesn’t seem right._

_Raphael’s voice echoes in his mind. “Your team has six other members. Tell me who dies.”_

_“I choose...Aaron Hotchner.”_

His eyes widen. “Hotch,” he blurts out. He looks around. “Where’s Hotch?”

Morgan reaches out and puts his hand on Spencer’s shoulder. “He’s here, kid. He got shot by Tobias, but he’s going to be alright.”

“He got shot?” Reid gasps.

“He’s going to be alright,” Emily reassures him. “Everything’s okay. He’s right here.”

It’s a struggle, but Reid manages to turn his head. In the bed next to him is Hotch, and he’s watching the others with a rare smile. “I’m right here, Reid.”

“You’re - you’re okay?”

“I’m going to be fine,” Hotch replies. “It’s good to see you’re awake.”

Instead of relaxing him, the sight of Hotch only seems to make the doctor more upset. “I’m sorry,” he cries. “I’m so sorry.”

Hotch’s brow furrows, and other others all seem perplexed. “What are you sorry for, Spencer?”

“Raphael made me choose,” Spencer sobs, hiding his face with his hands. “I didn’t want to but - but he made me. There was a bullet and I didn’t want to die - I didn’t want to die again and I said your name and I thought-”

“Spencer.” Aaron’s voice is quiet but firm, and it gets Reid to open his eyes. “Look at me.” He does. “None of this is your fault, you hear me?”

“But - but…” Spencer stammers. “I told him to do it. You wouldn’t have gotten hurt if I hadn’t told him…”

“And you’d be dead,” Hotch replies. “Spencer, you did what you had to survive. I’m proud of you.”

“But…”

Hotch looks at him earnestly. “I would take a dozen bullets for you, Spencer.”

Reid blinks. “Really?”

“He would, kid.” Derek squeezes Reid’s shoulder. “We all would.” All around, the others nod. Reid stares.

“You would…” He shakes his head. “How would that even happen? Seventy-two bullets, all shot at once, and each of you…”

Everyone chuckles. “Don’t think about it too hard, Pretty Boy,” Morgan says. “All you need to know is that we love you.”

**Author's Note:**

> content warning: guns/shooting, a little blood, hospitals, mentions of drug use, and some (mild) swearing
> 
> I tried to keep the details of Revelations as close to canon as possible, but I know it's not entirely accurate (I had to take a few liberties in order to get everything to work). I also want to say that I know a lot of people will be writing about Reid and Hankel for this prompt, but I hope you enjoyed my take on the episode! I definitely enjoyed writing it!
> 
>  _I never knew daylight could be so violent  
>  a revelation in the light of day  
> you can't choose what stays and what fades away  
> and I'd do anything to make you stay  
> no light, no light  
> tell me what you want me to say_  
> \- “No Light, No Light” by Florence + The Machine


End file.
